Beautiful Gifts - May 31

Ann Voskamp wrote a revolutionary book called 1000 Gifts a few years ago. I call it revolutionary because I never imagined that giving thanks for something could actually change people's lives. However... According to Ann, research as proven that people are 25% happier when they are actively grateful. And according to ME, my life is infinitely better when I live in an attitude of giving thanks every day, as opposed to griping every day.

That means that, in order for me to live my best year yet, I need to be grateful. Every day. Every week.

I certainly hope you will join me. I want to use Ann's list as a prompt to think outside of the normal, to reach further than where I would tend to go.  I may not go there every day, but I will use it as a resource. Prepare for a lovely list, and some fun stories as I add to MY list of Gifts!

3 Gifts Found in Church
1) Encouragement
2) Love and Growth
3) "I missed you!" A few weeks ago, I had to miss our church gathering because I had progressed to the District level for Toastmasters and had to go to California for our District Conference. When I came back the next weekend, I saw my four-year-old friend, C. The moment she got out of the car, she ran to me and said, "Emily! I missed you so much!" You can't beat that.

3 Gifts in Today's Work
This is ironic since Today's Work was church!
1) Air-Conditioning. When it's 102 degrees for the first time of the year, and your church is a start-up that meets in a theater, you're grateful that there is cold air to dry the sweat of your hard work!
2) People who care about seeing everyone free. We had the founder of FREE International join us today to talk about sex trafficking and how we can help. If you want to join us in helping to create a home for young girls who have been rescued from the sex trade to go to recover and heal, please go to www.soughtchurch.com/give, and give to Beyond Us. We're raising $10,000 this year.
3) Promise

The Art of Not Letting Circumstance Define You

When my alarm went off on Friday morning, the very first thought that ran through my head was this, 

“Now is the time to seize the day. Don’t be afraid and don’t delay. Nothing can break us, no one can make us give our rights away. Arise and seize the day!” 

If you don’t know 90s movie musicals like I do, that’s a song from Newsies. 1992. Christian Bale. Vinnie from Doogie Howser. Bliss. And their voices were in my head. 

No joke. 

I had tickets to see the musical, Newsies, at the Smith Center. I couldn’t wait. I sang the songs from the movie all morning long. My poor co-workers thought I was crazy, as I sang songs about New York and bringing Pulitzer down! 

I was on a high and I couldn’t wait for the curtain to rise. And then it happened. 

I work in a call center. One of the calls that came in was with someone who was both drunk and high. The callers were discussing sensitive issues. I was having a hard time with the call, but thought I could manage... until I took my next break.

Gone were the funny songs. Gone was the laughing and dancing. In their place was a cloud; dark, painful, seeing the worst in humanity.

I tried to shake it off, remembering that this wasn't MY call, it wasn't MY life, and that I serve a God who is much bigger than this. It just wouldn't go away.

Then, when I was almost home, I got a call from a good friend. He and I were discussing church, our goals, how to help people grow and seek Jesus more effectively. When I hung up, I rolled down the window, grinning at the warmth of the sun on my arms, got myself a Cherry Slush from Sonic, and felt like all was right in the world... and prepared to go have the time of my life at Newsies.

What?!
I mean... really?
Am I so fickle... am I so centered on my circumstances, that I let outside events dictate how I feel, and ultimately... who I am?

As I was getting ready that night, I started thinking. Do I really believe what God says? Do I believe what He says about me? About the other people in this world? About Himself?

I know the answers to those questions are "Yes." Maybe I should say, "Yes, mostly."

Because God says that I am the apple of His eye. That I am a treasured work of art--despite external circumstances. God says that He cares so much about the other people in this world--even those who are drunk and high and who people want to give up on--that He was willing to give His own life to bring them to Him. That they, too, are cherished. And He says that He is good, and purposeful, and works things together in the right way (albeit, maybe not the most comfortable way), and that He will never change, ever, and never leave me alone. Ever.

And if I can just learn to rely on THAT truth, instead of the things that I see during the day that can cause all kinds of uproar, I might end up feeling a little less... insane. A little more consistent. A little more the kind of person that He wants to shape me to be.

The more that I seek Jesus, the more these circumstances slide off of me and don't form who I am. The more that I seek Jesus, I see how deeply He is seeking me, and instead of allowing myself to absorb the anger and despair I see every day, I can feel His love and compassion for the circumstances that brought this about. When I'm confronted with the cultural mindset of poverty in the United States, I can choose not to judge, but instead to care. When I see people verbally abusing each other because that's all they've ever been taught, instead of cringing, I can pray. And I can live my life in such a way that can show love to people who've never felt anything other than condemnation and judgement.

This is not easy. This does not come easily to me.
But this is what Jesus would want in our world. More people loving. More people caring about others. More people depending on Him instead of letting our circumstances dictate who we are.

I will not be the same person I was on Friday, because Friday taught me something. Friday taught me that I need Jesus as my rock. So next Friday, when I have a call with someone who is drunk and high, I can commit to take one very difficult step closer to Jesus. I will grow. I will change. I will fight to lean more on Jesus and less on circumstance.

And it will be worth it.

A Life Well-Lived

Sometimes my heart feels like it's going to explode.

Often, I will spend a day stuck in the rut of everyday life... wake up. Shower.
Feed the cats. Drive to work and not yell at horrible drivers.
Interpret phone calls. Run errands. Go home. Eat dinner. Clean.
Do some church work. Read bible. Go to bed. 

If I'm not careful, these days run together. A blur of a life not well-lived. Simply existing. 

And then... 

I'm given an opportunity that makes me feel sick with nerves, like a speech contest. 

I am reminded of the beauty of a soul fighting for life against cancer. 

I see the sparkle of the city I call home and love so very much. 

I am able to work on the logistics of a database or a budget and feel capable and like I'm making a contribution. 

I connect with people I know and make them friends.

I get the opportunity to hug people at Sought Church, to share what Jesus is doing, or just to smile and welcome a new person. 

These things happen and I know that God has a use for a life filled with action and love and well-lived. More than simply existing. Truly LIVING and sharing that with others. 

And when that happens, my heart feels like it's going to explode.

It's such a good thing.

Is Work Meaningless?

At church right now we're going through a series on the Meaning of Life. I seriously thought it was crazy when the idea came up... because we're based in Ecclesiastes! If you've never read Ecclesiastes, give it a try. It's a little cray cray.

I love it, though. We're going through all these experiments that Solomon, known as the Teacher, does to see where meaning in life happens.

Today, I had the privilege of talking about WORK. Solomon talks about work a lot in Chapter 2.

Basically, he's all depressed because when he dies, he DIES. His stuff goes to someone else who will probably squander it all.

But then he figures out something crazy... there's meaning in life when we recognize that work is a gift from God... because God has a PURPOSE for that work.

I wrote this message and thought it was a neat and tidy little package. And then I got a call at work on Friday (I interpret telephone calls into English and Sign Language) that messed me up for the rest of the day. That was real life. The call emptied me. The only purpose I saw at work was that I HAD to be there to pay the medical bills for my recent surgery.

Suck-fest.

On my way home, God made me re-examine what I was talking about in church. He's like, "Emily... if you can't process this today, you don't get to talk about it on Sunday." Crap.

So let me tell you about purpose, and the purpose that God has created for me, specifically, in the way in which I earn money.

1) I provide access for individuals to make telephone calls. This is amazing. That the technology is there for the integration of video and voice and that I work REALLY hard to make sure that every call sounds as natural as it can be. The rewards of this are being asked, "Are your parents Deaf?" or told, "I wish you were my interpreter EVERY time!" or "You sounded JUST like my sister."

This is good. It really is. But that is the purpose that God has for EVERY interpreter in my situation.

2) I used to work for the State. I quit my job there without being assured of another job somewhere else (only do this when you are 100% sure this is a leading from God!). Purpose? Trusting God.

I got a job as an interpreter. Purpose? Earning money. Building seniority. Understanding the job. Working somewhere with centers nationwide.

I was able to move anywhere. Purpose? I could move to Las Vegas, still earn money to pay for rent, and be available to serve God in a way in which He's designed me. Leading. Preaching. Administrationing. Creating databases and sending cards and speaking and making friends and talking about Jesus and joining Toastmasters and going to coffee shops and... Everything I'm doing here in Vegas is because of the gift that God has given me.


So even on days when I don't care for my job, or when I have rough calls or callers, or I get flipped off, or have to drop the F-bomb 27 times in one conversation, I know God still has a purpose. And I'm so very grateful for that.

What Opportunities Look Like

Many of you know that I quit my job in November/December in the hopes that God would move me into ministry.  I had a hope of a part-time job that would pay the bills until something opened up--either part-time (to pair with the other job) or full-time.  Secretly, however, I wanted everything to work out perfectly...  You know: announce my resignation one day, be offered the most perfect ministry job the next?

I should know better by now.

God doesn't work that way in my life.  I have heard of story after story of how He's done that for others, but not for me.  For me, for whatever reason, it's about the waiting.  The waiting, which is... really frustrating.  But also... it's reassuring, if I take a really big step back.  (OK, a REALLY big step back!)  God is always up to something in my life, but He always takes His time doing it.  It's part of how I know it's Him working.

So I'm not working in paid ministry.  Opportunities to serve, however, have exploded. 
Seriously.

I have even met with those who have walked this path before, and gleaned so much from their experience.  One of the main lessons I'm learning?

"Whatever you're doing, it's experience.  Use it.  Learn from it.  Grow from it.  

It'll add one more tool to your toolbox."

This is probably some of the best advice I've gotten so far. 

•  That job that isn't ministry, but pays the bills?  Learn from it:  Develop trust before you share your message.
• Teaching those kids?  If you can communicate the truth of God to children, you can communicate it to adults.
• Managing greeters?  Hone your administrative and encouragement sides.  Keep your eyes open and pay attention to the people around you.  Lead a ministry.
• Speaking in church?  Study.  Pray.  Practice.  Figure out which hand YOU need to hold the microphone in.  Be YOU.

There is so much more I'm involved in, and I'm looking around every corner now for the tidbits that I'm learning, the parts that I can glean from each person and experience. 

Colossians 4:5 says to "make the most out of every opportunity."  Challenge accepted!

Change is in the air...

Autumn came to Washington with a smile that was warm, inviting, and completely refreshing.  The leaves changed colors--bright reds, oranges, and yellows, mingled with the long-lasting deep greens of summer.  The rains didn't come, not for a long time.  So different than normal in Washington.  Once they came, however, we were once again reminded of the freshness the water brings.  The newness, even in the dying of the earth's plants, the water washed it all clean.  Even the fellows at my parent's house soaked in that first rain, after waiting until mid-October.

I talk about the fall because, well, it's about change.  As we change from the heat and dryness of summer, to the chill and wetness of winter, we experience change...  Externally--school buses crowd our commutes again, daylight slips away, fields flood with an excess of rain. 

Perhaps because our world is full of change, I embrace it, like a close, well-loved friend.  When I have the opportunity to learn something new, to change projects I'm working on... I feel challenged and alive.

At this point in my life, I feel like the dry summer is about to come to an end.  I've made such a drastic change in my life right now, that I know the rain is about to fall.  The change in season is awakening and feeding a yearning in my life to serve God even more wholly--to know Him and His will even more closely than before.  It's right before the rain falls that things are the scariest...  The fires come and burn the dry brush.  The scorched earth bakes in the sun.  The animals choose poison to eat, simply because it is the only green left in their fields.  It can feel... desperate. 

And then the first drop comes.  Like a tear, a cry so soft, so desperate...  The second drop falls.  The third.  The earth is quickly awash with moisture, the ground soaking it in, drinking it in, as if it has never experienced this before.  So it is in life--the fires wash away, hope dances in the puddles, change is in the air.

It is frightening.  The rain can wash away the dry soil.  The rain can come too late to give the grass the nutrients it needs.  The rain can flood and destroy. 

BUT...  CHANGE... it's in the air.

And it's fresh and clean and oh, so exciting.

Gleeful Feeding :)

So I just watched the second to last episode of last season's Glee. Do you watch Glee? It's the most fantastically fantastic show on TV right now, at least in my opinion. And when you watch the episode for the second time, you catch the little bits that you missed the first time - and laugh even harder. This was the Lady Gaga episode and it was so fun this time to sing along to Bad Romance and Poker Face--songs I'd never even heard of before this... that I know own on CD! I can't wait till next week when the new season starts! I have to watch it the day after after it airs, though--it's on too late for me. :)

Today we had the Combined Fund Drive fair at work. CFD is through the state, a way for state employees to donate to charities. Today was several of those charities in one big event. I LOVE these fairs. (We have Public Employee Appreciation, a Safety Fair, CFD... the diversity fair was cancelled this year... but they're so fun!) I always get a ton of STUFF at them... and when I moved my office a few months ago, I had a "garage sale"--all the crap that I'd collected over the years went out on the file cabinets for whoever wanted them. I probably had about 20 or 30 items! It was great!

Anyway, today's fair was fun because I got to see the folks from Feline Friends. that's where I adopted my kitties from. They're such wonderful people--and I got to see my babies' foster mom, too! She loves seeing pictures of the boys and hearing stories about them... they were her first fosters! They're having a bit of a rough year this year... They did a rescue of 42 cats from a horrible environment and had astronomical bills. If you can help them at all, I'm sure they'd appreciate it. You can even donate online.

While talking to them, I mentioned that I'm transitioning the boys to raw food. THIS has been an adventure. This week I chopped up my first raw chicken into tiny little bits... very gross. ;) But... they seem to be happy. Cosmo has lost about 4 pounds... I'd like to see him up about 1 lb--then he'll be really healthy. Lucky, on the other had, has gained weight. He weighs approximately 20 pounds now--he's a beast. I want him to DROP about 4 pounds. I'm hoping that this diet will do just that. As of yesterday, they're on 100% raw at night, but still with kibble in the morning. I don't have any organs in the meat that I have, so I'm nervous about completely switching them. Plus, Lockwood isn't completely keen on the bones yet, so I'm giving him time to learn how to eat it. They seem content, though... they do love their chickens!! I'm kind of looking forward to watching for sales and seeing what other meats I can get for them... they can have beef and poultry and rabbit... pork... occassionally a fish, but you've got to watch the mercury levels--that could get dangerous. For right now, as I'm learning, I'm staying away from raw fish. If you're interested at all, I'll keep you updated. If you're grossed out... I'm sorry! ;)

5 Things I'm Thankful for TODAY

1. I had to feed llamas at my dad's house today. No one was around, so after I gave them grain and hay (they love me forever), I wandered out into one of the fields. It was warm and toasty... the sun was golden on the dry grasses. The ground crunched as I walked, and crickets leaped out of my way while calling their songs to each other. It was VERY good.

2. I still only have a couple unread emails at work (and they're unread for a reason). I used to have about 100 on a daily basis.

3. Once I go to bed I get to sleep in a little bit longer because I have a doctor's appointment in the morning and it's not worth going to work before it.

4. I had a dream last night that I got engaged to Chandler Bing, but wasn't ME... I'd lost my... well, my SPUNK if you will. It was a really good reminder to me to be ME in a relationship.

5. I get to get off the computer and go read about Jesus. That's got to count for a few, eh?

OK, so I don't normally blog much about work... but I'm in charge of a fairly exciting project these days... We're developing standards for sign language interpreters in Washington Courts. It's pretty exciting, pretty high profile, and will make quite an impact on the quality of services in our state.

Still in the Bible daily... It's been over a year and half now... completely unbelievable. God has SERIOUSLY gotten me through tough times (brain cancer, anyone?) and good times, too. I'm amazed at the stuff I've learned. Here... let me share about one of the psalms... a friend asked me what I'd been reading and this was my response.

Psalm 13

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

¹ How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me? ² How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and every day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
³ Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;
⁴ my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
⁵ But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.
⁶ I will sing to the LORD,
for he has been good to me.

So I read this and was really intrigued. David's freaking out. Seriously - God is S.I.L.E.N.T. He's depressed, scared, running for his life. People want to kill him. He's crying out in anguish to God. BUT. But he trusts in his love and salvation. He sings to God "for he has been good to me." You have to say, "But DAVID - you just said he left you alone! How can he be ignoring you AND be good to you?! and look at your contradiction here: Every day you have sorrow in your heart AND your heart rejoices in God's salvation? WHA????"

And then it kind of hits you (me at least). Oh. It's ok to feel far away and despairing and STILL know the love of God. You don't have to FEEL His love to KNOW it. You just trust it and KNOW that He is God.

Blog for Serry

Check out Serry's blog on the right... I'll have updates there on what's going on in her (and therefore OUR) life.

Thanks all.

Fall is here... rainy rainy rainy. It's nice, though... I like the rain.

MO for prayer

I found something on Outlook 2007 I HATE yesterday... I schedule interpreters for our office and that means that I use Outlook to track everything. I have my own scheduling calendar, but I put the info in all of our Deaf staff's calendars, including changing the category to an Interpreter(s) Scheduled category. All is fine and good until I come to a series - you now can't change the category of an individual appointment in a series... it's all or nothing, baby. Any tech geeks out there know the way around this? (And no, I can't break up the series'--they aren't my appointments!) I just want them to be YELLOW!

All for now...

Happy New Year!

Seriously... at work, today was the last day of the fiscal year. I'm sure some of you out there follow the same calendar that I do, and if you do... I hope you had little stress and lots of laughter. (In my office the much stress was the CAUSE of the laughter! It's really hard to talk to your boss when he's mocking you, lol.)

Anyway, with the end of the fiscal year starts the beginning of July. I'm excited about July... kind of nervous in a way, but nervous like I would be if i were going to meet someone famous. See... if you've kept up with the 30 List at all, you know that I've been in the Bible every day this year. I've honestly NEVER done that before... which is funny because I LOVE Scripture. I just... I'm lazy, i guess. Anyway, this started out as a commitment I made to God at church 6 months ago--and now has become a combination challenge/joyful journey. Each month almost, God has challenged me with something new, a commitment to add another chapter on to the reading, etc. July... well, I don't want to get into it all here, but July will continue where I've been (a minimum of 3 chapters a day--more is ALWAYS an option, lol), and... EXTRA. SO... feel free to ask about the extra... I'm hoping to have things to share about on here next month. I'm up for a CHANGE in my heart and my relationship with God--so here's hoping. :)

Oh, and I thought I'd share in case... I saw a note from Mary Beth yesterday... and she is hurting. She misses her baby. Please continue to remember them in prayer (and those others who have lost someone so dear as well). God is faithful and He will continue to make a way out of this darkness that they face.

PackRat

Yes, I'm a PackRaddict. If you don't know what PackRat is, just let John and I and some of the others who play randomly invite you to gain more credits. ;)

So, I thought I'd post something a little more interesting for you than a list. ;)

I'm going to be leading a small group soon. I love my small group right now - it's been a fantastic opportunity to meet people and grow in Philippians. :) It's just time to start my OWN group. Now I just have to pick a book to go through... I had thought something from the Old Testament would be interesting... or maybe Hebrews? That would be cool... Just waiting to see.

Just did site reviews in Vancouver. That was interesting.

Oh, it's been snowing. In Western Washington. In Spring. HOW RANDOM.

OK, I guess I don't have a lot to write about. ta ta!

Bake Sale

We raised $425 in one day for our bake sale! That makes me so excited!!

I have an addiction

...it's called Libby's Great Pumpkin Cookie. Seriously. My mom used to make them when I was little - I think I have kindergarten pictures of us eating pumpkin cookies. A few years ago, I found the recipe and try to make them every year. The batch is HUGE (think, among the other ingredients, 4 cups of flour and 2 cups of oats... yeah, that's a lot).

Well, we have a bake sale on Thursday for our ADWAS family. I decided to make these because they're YUM and make a lot and fairly easy.

I've eaten two plus the equivelant of that in batter... and I want more... after I told myself I could have ONE total. And I DESPERATELY want to go downstairs for more. lol

I have GOT to get these things out of my house! :)

Morning time...

OK - it's 6:54 am. I am supposed to leave in 6 minutes for work. Still have to get my shoes on. However, my iPod is charging (it was almost dead) and I want to give it at least a few more minutes of extra charge... sometimes it's what saves me at work and allows me to focus on my job instead of other things going on! lol

Quick update...

Saturday is the Olympia High School BearZaar. If you're in O-Town, swing by! It's fun times. I'll be there with my mom's booth (Heartfelt Treasures) and I get a corner for TOHE.

The kittens are almost not kittens anymore. The 30th is their first birthday and then they'll be officially adults. They're finishing their last bag of kitten food... it's so weird. Lockwood is up to 13 pounds--and growing! Cosmo is 11.5.

We're having a bake sale at work on the 29th. Raising money for our adopted family from ADWAS. Pretty fun - this is our third year. We went with a mom and 2 kids this year. I'm buying the boys cross necklaces... I'm looking forward to that.

I've gone to Faith Assembly of Lacey a few times now. I like it there. I'm meeting one of the pastors for lunch today - Excited for that.

OK, it's 7:00. Happy day to you all. :)

What am I doing???

It's 10:50 on a Friday night and I'm sitting in my office staring at my computer... reading course schedules and Master's programs. I'm partially depressed because I can't just quit my job and my committments and do what i want - jump back into school, perhaps be a professional student? Seriously... I wouldn't mind learning for the rest of my life.

I suck at friendships, it seems, at least ones down here. Sorry, guys - I love you, I do. It's just... it's hard when it feels like there is such an age difference. I'm probably - well, it's an excuse. I'm sorry.

I dont' know what I'm doing with my life. At 29, aren't we supposed to know where we're going? Start saving up a little nest egg or something? Not scrimping by, hoping not to get an overdraft, wondering if there's enough cash to buy some milk... knowing what kind of job (or ministry) is where we want to go...

I feel like I've been in the exact same place for the past 4 years. Once I graduated, nothing changed. I'm just 4 years older.

I'm praying about the attitude, sorry (bracelet switch). It's just that... each year, each month, each DAY... i feel a little lonelier, a little more lost.

I think I should head to bed - and get a good night of sleep tonight. Night all.

Sabbath

Today is the first day in a LONG time when I've actually taken a Sabbath-a day of rest. I'm at the ocean... Parents just left. I slept in, went to breakfast, watched a movie, took a nap, read, chatted with my mom (it being mothers day)... Now I'm considering either making dinner and reading or driving down to the beach to watch the sun set.
Work can take over again tomorrow. Today is MINE.
Emily

Greetings from Pasco

Hi everyone. I'm in Pasco - that's in Eastern WA - for work. Had a site reveiw in Spokane today, then drove down here. 2 here today, the I fly back to Seattle tomorrow evening. It's a long week, and I'm really tired.

I'm sitting on my hotel bed right now - watching Growing Pains. I love Growing Pains. Kirk Cameron was such a cutie. ;) I love a lot of the new, intense, don't-miss-a-week, TV shows (24, Heroes, etc.) but I really do miss 80s sitcoms. This, Who's the Boss?, Family Ties, The Cosby Show, etc.

Guess what? Saturday I get to pick up... my two new little boys!!! :) I'm still grieving over Whiskers - I really do miss her. It's been so difficult not to have her around. However... last weekend I went to a cat rescue place called Feline Friends. It's pretty incredible. They've rescued so many lost and abused kitties. When I went, the litter of kittens (originally 4) was down to two. I was looking for a girl, but... decided to go ahead and look - can't hurt, right? Well...

I went in to the kitten room and met these two little two and a half month old boys. They were crazy. They were adorable. They were so sweet. They're twins, both black with little puffs of white on their chests. I left there struggling - I loved them, but they were BOYS... well, after a day of realizing that I don't NEED a girl, and that it might be a nice switch - and a separation of "categories" from Whiskers... I called Feline Friends and said "I want to adopt them!"

I'm picking them up on Saturday!!! I'm so excited. I think we're all going to be good for each other. :) I'll post pictures this weekend. :)